Update | Fumbling

“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.”

― C.S. Lewis

I just read through my last update post to see what I wrote then, and I realised Mum was still alive. The post was published on November 6th, and I wrote that I didn’t know how much we had left, if her health would decline in stages or be a slippery slope. She lived for ten days after that, and it was like falling into an abyss with nothing to reach for to lessen the fall. I hope you never have to live through it, but I fear some of you will.

As you might have guessed I haven’t written much. I get a total of 17.863 when adding everything up, so not great, but under the circumstances…

My total so far for 2022 is 340.198. I need to check my word count on the 31st, so I can see if I make 350.000 😊

I average 994 a day, and I have to say I’m disappointed I’ve dropped down under 1k, but ah well.

Any day now, I’m gonna sit down with a pen and paper and make a plan for 2023, a real one. It’s just the bandwidth is lacking at the moment. I’m trying to finish Holly’s February story and am stressing about not having started her March story, and then I wanted a release on Ofelia the first quarter and… 🥵

The funeral is on the 15th, maybe I can focus a little better after that.